Certain situations allow us to know ourselves better. The recent incident of my father in law getting admitted to the hospital as his health deteriorated, made me realize that I suck at comforting people.
My mother in law was understandably inconsolable. Her whole world revolves around her husband. Seeing him emaciated was a blow to her. So there she was sitting in the corner in the waiting lounge while her tears coursed down her cheeks in silent. And what was I doing? Her younger daughter in law? I just sat next to her. I said nothing and did nothing. I was feeling numb inside. In order to avoid fearing the worst, I have acquired the skill of not feeling and thinking anything not even the positive thing.
My heart on the other hand was telling me to comfort my mother in law. 'Say something' 'Hold her hand' but my head said 'No!' Best not to say anything foolish and make her sadder. So there I was torn inside while my mother in law sat staring at the blank space.
Out of the blue, a lady appeared and embraced my mother in law. Aunty N is a family friend and her husband was admitted in the same hospital. When she heard about my father in law's condition, she sought out for my mother in law.
I couldn't hear what they were talking but I saw my mother in law crying in Aunty N's arms while she stroked her and spoke in a firm voice.
My husband then introduced me to her son who was his friend as well. While we were trading stories about our respective kids, Aunty N approached us and told my hubby that we needed to be strong. Her exact words after that were ' Don't manifest and foresee' Those words struck a chord within me. My father in law may be weak and his reports did not look promising but he was still here and we needed to avoid fearing the worst.
I knew then God sent Aunty N to us to pass this message and that night we held a prayer rally for my father in law and by God's grace, the very next day his condition improved and is still continuing to improve.
I met Aunty N again the next day. Her husband was in the operation theater undergoing a procedure but she still sought out my mother in law and continued to comfort her. She advised us to pray and that's the best we can do. She even added that God made her and my mother in law meet because He wanted them to comfort each other. And she commented on how some people go on lamenting why they needed to suffer (You know, the universal 'Why me?! question) to which she simply answered 'Why not?' and continued saying that 'One is not special to be spared of hardship'. Which is true because God doesn't test us unless he knows we can endure it. Deep, huh?
Aunty N spoke in a simple manner but her messages were powerful. My mother in law seems a little less worried now. She seems more determined to get her husband out of the hospital at the soonest. When she is not talking, I find her reciting some mantras. Although my father in law is still in the hospital, he is out of the woods and we are convinced he is on the road to recovery albeit a long one.
We are truly grateful to meet the wonderful Aunty N. She made us realize how important is it to send out the right messages to the universe so we get the results we want.
God works in mysterious ways and he gave us Aunty N to put us on the right perspective when we thought the future seemed bleak. Most importantly, she has taught me to learn how to comfort people and to say the right things. It doesn't matter if they want to hear it or not, it is my job to deliver the message since giving is always way better than receiving, right?
Thank you Aunty N and may god bless you always.
