Bye Bye 2015 & Hola 2016

I can't belive that 2015 is at her very last day. I feel that way because typically on a new year's eve, I would be busy spending time with my diary and probably cleaning up the house to usher in the New Year as a clean slate.

Instead I am at my in law's house sitting next to Pebbles who is asleep after taking a bout of medication.Poor baby n hubby are recovering from flu and fever and she has a nasty attack of diaper rash. So you can imagine how the past few days have been for me. I was frantic and I actually sobbed out loud when her toy hit my toe.It was super painful and in sadness I lamented that I was not being a good parent and I don't think I should have more children etc. I am a drama queen no doubt about that.

Just two hours ago when I was chasing after Pebbles who has taken a liking to my father in law's colourful tablets, I wished I had a fairy godmother.And if she was to grant me a wish, I would say that I would one night alone at J.W Marriott Hotel. Just to sink into the heavenly bed with fluffy pillows and to have an uninterrupted bath. Talk about wishful thinking...sigh

So 2015 has been an eventful year for me.I quit my job, started yoga,dabbled in blog, attended a course in translation & editing and passed (yay!), making my way slowly into the spiritual world and made some great friends. So if I am to think what would my new year resolutions be I supposed I should break them down into a few categories:

1.Physical
I will continue practicing Yoga. I will eat healthier (I have too!) and exercise

2. Mental
I will focus on maintaining my energies well so I am balanced and don't get stressed up too easily. ( Keeping my fingers and toes crossed)

3. Financial
I will strive to be empowered financially.

4. Spiritual
I will continue to explore the spiritual world and reap its benefits. Yay to powerful subconscious mind

5. Career
I am not sure how soon I will get into the full time working world but in the meantime I will utilize all the skills that I have and have acquired to do something worthwhile

6. Social
I have always had issues with self esteem.So here's to higher self confidence which would in turn improve my social life.

7. Family
Tough one.I am a mother of one and I hope to continue to be that for 2016. Baby no.2 can wait for a while.As usual I aspire to be a better person in the various hats I don: daughter, sister, wife, mother, aunty, daughter in law, sister in law, niece and granddaughter

Here's to a better year ahead

Bring it on, 2016

I share the same sentiments

Chemistry is the word

Hubby and I went to watch Dilwale the other day. A Hindi movie starring the darlings of Bollywood; Shah Rukh Khan and Kajol.

The movie was so-so although I admit I was laughing so much till my sides ached at some scenes and Kajol is absolutely lovely to look at. She has aged beautifully now that she is in her 41st year. In fact she looks far more beautiful than she did 20 years ago.

Thinking hard and analysing unnecessarily as I usually do,I couldn't help but feel amazed at the chemistry she and SRK share on screen. I mean they just have to glance at each other and you know that a thousand words have been spoken between them. This brings to my question, would you not find it disturbing if your spouse shares a sizzling chemistry with someone else besides yourself? Wouldn't it be more disturbing if you do not have chemistry at all with your spouse but you have it with someone else? Gasp!

Is that why affairs occur? *cringe with fear*

Of course they are actors and they are supposed to emote wonderfully but it is just something about these two that makes you feel that true love exists and your heart does skip a beat for that person..sigh..told you I am a hopeless romantic.

Bollywood movies are famous for the sappy storylines but no actors in the world would convey messages through their eyes as effectively as Bollywood actors and actresses.I don't think there is any other pairs like the SRK-Kajol duo that can create magic on screen and that chemistry alone can be the saving grace of any movies.

May we continue basking in the magic of Bollywood films.

My cheeky husband had to say this when I posed the question to him 'Darling,why you need chemistry when we have biology?' haha I seriously think he should be a stand up comedian to generate extra income.



Image from Google

A plea for the soon to be wedded Hindu couple

The wedding season is over for the year. I meant for the Indian community as the Marghazli month has dawned upon us. This is the month the priests will be super busy with temple festivals amidst combating the monsoon season in India (So that is why Hindu weddings are not conducted during the Marghazli month which is technically from Dec 16-Jan 13).

I have attended a number of weddings this year partly because I love weddings (and I was invited to them, duh)and also wedding planning is something what my husband and I do as well. What I have observed throughout this year is that many of the brides and grooms had demanded to cut short the rituals in the name of having a simple wedding.

Unlike the weddings of other races, the Hindu wedding is conducted in the ancient language of India which is Sanskrit and obviously most of us do not speak the language any more thus the problem of not understanding the rituals involved. Therefore many of the soon to be wedded couple decide to forgo some rituals to give way for more time for photography sessions and also entertainment for the guests.

It saddens me when many of them demand to have a 'simple' wedding but spend so much of money on the venue, decorations, entertainment and other things by being oblivious to the fact that the Hindu wedding is steeped with so much blessings for the newlyweds.

A Hindu wedding celebrates the fact that it takes a village to raise a child thus the rituals always involve the uncles and aunties of the intended bride and groom. Each ritual from the coconut breaking to getting the blessings from the parents signify the importance of family ties and values particularly respect.

One of my favourite pastimes is watching wedding videos on YouTube ( I call that doing research for wedding planning) so the other day, I came across a wedding video of a mixed race couple. The bride is an Indian and the groom is a Mat Salleh. He looked dashing in the traditional attire and even his parents wore them too. He was at ease throughout the ceremony and my heart beamed with pride when he fulfilled a ritual called the 'Patham Pooja' It is a ritual where the bride and groom would respectively washed their parents' feet and receive their blessings. It is a poignant ritual as it signifies their eternal gratitude for raising them and conducting the wedding. So this white dude happily did the ritual and looked up at his parents with both palms together in the universal greeting and his parents smiled at him proudly. I doubt they understood the meaning of the ritual but they did understand the importance of it and took part in it without any qualms. When it was the bride's turn, her mother clung to her husband and sobbed because it was evident that she felt overwhelmed with happiness that her daughter was getting married and will be leaving the nest soon. Having watched that particular scene warms my heart because I know a couple who did not want to have this ritual because they wanted to save time. Seriously?!!

I find it incredibly silly when couples refuse to prostrate before their parents or any other elderly people. They deem it as an act of submissiveness when in actual fact it emphasizes respect and humility. Please get your facts right, people. It irks me when they say 'No way I would fall at their feet. Why should I?' I always have the strong urge to smack their heads when they say that.

Did you know that besides the part when the Thali is tied, another significant ritual for the bride is the 'Kanyathanam'? This is when the parents of the bride will give away their daughter to the groom and his family while the priest chants the mantra which basically means, 'Dude,I am giving you my daughter, you and your family better treat her like one of your own' (Of course the actual words are far more polite than what I have written) I always tear at this part of the ceremony.

It's true that the marriage is far more important than the wedding itself (wise words from my sister in law, SIL No.1) however most of us only marry once in our lifetime so why don't we strive to have a wholesome one? Instead of spending hours mulling over the colour theme, food testing, types of jewellery etc, do research on the wedding you will be having specifically the significance of the rituals. Ask the elderly people in your life or you can find out from the Internet. Spend some time chatting with the priest who will be conducting your wedding, he would be able to impart valuable information.Here I have attached a link on the significance of the rituals, I found from the internet.

http://tamilhinduweddings.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/Hand-Book-Print-version.pdf

So my plea is, my dear soon to be married Indian couple, seek to understand the meaning of the rituals before you unceremoniously 'cut them' from the wedding plan. It is either you have a full blown wedding with the rituals intact or have one without them i.e registration or even the 'Archanai Kalyanam' a simple wedding conducted in the temple right in front of Lord Ganesha. Please don't 'butcher' the rituals just because you want to have a simple wedding. Conducting these rituals don't involve much money. Do seek to do the right thing at the right time.

As soon as Mr.(Always) Right tied the Thali around my neck, I gave the thumbs up much to the amusement of our guests. If only we can get married again, sigh :)

Plans

For a person who plans ahead, I find it unnerving when my plans go awry. For the past one month, I have been living from day to day basis without a hint of planning. And that irks me. Partly because I don't like surprises and also perhaps it makes me feel unproductive.

Due to some circumstances plus the fact that we have one car, I feel shackled having not being able to carry out my plans.Throw in a baby with no definite routine, it's a recipe for changes in plans. Every night when I go to sleep, I will prepare a checklist mentally only to see it unchecked at the end of the following day.

You know how irritating that is? I used to bask in happiness whenever I cross out items in my to do list.Nothing gives me greater satisfaction than knowing I am done for the day and I was productive.

Ok, enough of whining, let's focus on a solution.Everything happens for a reason, right? So maybe this happening to me so I can be more flexible. I don't have to be rigid in ensuring I have a plan and I stick by it.Maybe for starters I should just have a framework of things that I need to get done and be cool and composed when things don't work out the way I want them to be. Easier said than done. I wonder how the others manage to do it? Do they work on some law of attraction? While I ponder on that, I should perhaps focus on eliminating procrastination from my life so I would be flexible and open enough to do A instead of the intended B.

I suppose I should do more people watching to find out how the others are more accommodating with changes in plans. The perks of a not working person; we could always come up with something silly and conduct research on it.

Ta ta

A fine young lady

You know how I like to observe people and look out for their best qualities? After a long time, I found myself admiring a 15 year old girl who is none other than my hubby's cousin's kid.Technically she is my niece too.

In times where kids are now ignorant of good values, it is certainly like a breath of fresh air when I spend time with this young lady. She is pretty, smart and confident plus very grounded. She does not have a hint of smugness on her although it is apparent she is an all rounder; excellent in sports,music and academic.

What I like most about her is how attuned she is to people's needs. Simple example is when everyone is gathered at a place chit chatting, she makes sure no one is without a chair. And speaks to everyone!

My in laws are now staying with her family as my father in law needs follow up check at the hospital and unlike any teenager who would lock up himself or herself in the room, this young lady takes the effort in engaging with conversations with my in laws including my grumpy father in law. It shows what a sensitive soul, she is.

She is competitive yet plays fair and is close to her cousins. She is the oldest among the grandchildren so the rest of the kids look up to her. She is strict with them but also smothers them with much love.

I commented once to her father, what a great job he and his wife had done raising such a wonderful young lady and he simply answered that it is all her doing meaning it's an innate thing.

That makes me wonder how do you inculcate that in a child? How do I ensure Pebbles behaves the same way at 15?

My parents hardly lectured us on values but we picked them up along the journey of life.We respect the elders and offer opinions in a civil way and although we may not be brave or outspoken like nowadays kids, we had a fairly great childhood.

For a person (me) who has had self esteem issues all her life, I am amazed at how easily my niece navigates life although being imposed with burdens of being the first child of the family just like myself.Hubby as usual mentioned that sports helped her greatly in shaping her confidence and good values. I agree but I also believe she has the extra ingredient that makes her stand out from the rest of 15 year olds.

As old fashioned as I sound, I find it very imperative for a person to have respect.I firmly believe one gives and takes respect. Greeting people with a sincere heart is one of the finest quality a person can have and I am so glad my niece has that.

When you build your life on the basis of respect, you have already laid a solid foundation and the chances of going astray is very very slim.

This young niece of mine is going to go places and make a name for herself.I don't have a shadow of a doubt that she is going to lead a very contented life simply because she has it in her. As for me, as much as I am proud of the responsible and respectful young lady she has become, I am blessed that Pebbles has a role model to look up to.

I learn a lot from people I meet and mingle and from this niece of mine, I have learned to have an open heart and face life headlong.

Thank you, sweets..

Unblock your Chi

My cousin and I attended a preview talk the other day on unblocking the chi in us to lead a healthier life. Chi is basically energy in Chinese.

It is believed that the aches and pains we experience are caused by two factors:

1. External factor
    Too much exposure to these elements can bring on diseases:

• heat
• wind
• cold
• humidity

2. Internal factors are your inner desires. Apparently, if you experience any of the following emotions with high intensity, a particular organ can be affected.

    a. Joy=Heart

    b. Anger=Liver

    c. Anxiety=Spleen

    d. Worry=Stomach

    e. Sadness=Lung

    f.  Fear=Kidney

    g. Shock=Sexual Organ

The trainer even conducted a demo on a person, asking a series of questions to identify the root cause of her neck pain and subsequently easing her pain using a magnetic ball.

The 2 hr talk was a preview to the actual training program which will be held from Jan 7-10

 2016 in KL but it costs a whooping RM10k!

Way too expensive for us but at least we got something out of this preview talk. 

A few members in my laws and I have a WatsApp group where we share information on alternative lifestyle so when I updated them about the talk we attended, SIL No.1 commented that the reason she had a heart attack was because she was overjoyed to which the Guruji in the group (the uncle who preaches meditation) cheekily added what were the consequences faced by her husband when he received the shock of his life..hahaha

When Chi is unblocked, you are liberated from the negativity that bogs you down and your subconscious mind just becomes stronger which would benefit other aspects of your life so it is apparent that the change should start within.

So here's to positive chi

Image from Google

Meditation

Apart from Yoga, I have been dabbling in meditation. Only yesterday, I completed the mandatory 90 day cycle of a meditation I started in August. I obviously felt triumphant having to complete it but meditation is not easy. It is not easy to keep still and focus when you have an over-active mind like mine.

My cousin who also meditates says that he constantly needs to battle with the monkey mind of his which he cheekily adds is drunk and is possibly stung by a scorpion. It was hilarious when I tried to picture his description but it is true, it is incredibly impossible to still our mind. In order to meditate effectively,you need to know how to sweep aside the thoughts that are playing in your mind when you try to meditate and it can be achieved through practice.

We spend hours mindlessly surfing the channels on TV after a hard day's at work so why not meditate instead. Focus on your breathing and reach deep within yourself. It is an exhilarating feeling and I highly recommend you to do that. Meditation is not only about chanting some mantras. It is about taking some time off to reconnect yourself. Disconnect from the outer world and go inwards.

So yeah, that is what I have been busy doing and I can't say I am perfect at it but at least I am trying which is important, right? Just today, I came across an article in a magazine which states that meditation helps to alleviate loneliness which ultimately can cure depression. It also encourages mental clarity and teaches you to be present at all times (tough for a day dreamer like me)

As for me, it helped me to see things in different perspectives. I no longer lose my temper easily and I am more careful with what I say meaning I am more mindful (yeap no longer the sarcastic, Deann)

For many years, I have been giving excuses about meditating which includes not being able to focus or concentrate. I still can't 100% but at least I am trying and I am convinced with practise, I'd be a pro at it. Meditation helps with overall health and I like that because you don't sweat when you meditate..hahahaha

So do some research and find out how you would like to do it i.e with music, guided, chanting or simply sit and inhale and exhale. Just spend 20 minutes a day doing it and do it for 40 days without fail so the act gets embedded in your subconscious mind.

Trust me at the end of Day 40, you will see a new you.

Happy meditating

OM

Image from Google

Story of My Life

I cant believe it has been almost 3 weeks since I last wrote an entry. As much as I missed articulating the thoughts in my head, life has been crazy these past weeks until I couldn't spare some time to type away. In a nutshell, I was on a roller coaster ride filled with a myriad of emotions these past weeks.Let me see if I can sum it up based on the characters of Inside Out:

Joy

My good friend,Nadine whom I have known since kindergarten got hitched last Saturday. I missed her ceremony but her reception was grand and I had fun catching up with other friends. Pebbles was her usual self flirting around and decided rather ceremoniously to poop then. Kind hubby took care of it. I have never seen a pair of happier newly weds. I am so glad she finally found her Prince Charming and get to act out her love story. Writing this is already making my eyes water. When her husband gushed about how great a person she is I couldn't help but feel proud of her. She is indeed a very special person and I am super duper happy for her.

Pebbles turned 1 on November 11. I can't believe my baby is now a big girl who is incredibly cute and bossy to the boot. Hubby and I were reminiscing our journey the past year and although it has been filled with many sleepless nights, puke, poop, urine and tears, I must say gummy smiles, cheeky grins, bubbly laughter and Pebbles' milestones sure surpass all the yucky parts. Well, I am sure she had a great day. We spent some hours at the hospital with my in laws. Face time with my side of the family (Thanks to technology!) and had a sweet birthday party with another cousin's kid who shares the same birthday. He celebrated his 11th while Pebbles celebrated her 1st. In 10 years, she would be celebrating her 11th and his 21st!! Sigh, how do I stop time from rocketing away?
Sadness

So what has happened? Well for a start, my poor father in law has been admitted to the hospital. He has been unwell for a while and poor thing had to be hospitalized to get things in order. His morale is very low at the moment and it is everyone fervent wish he gets back on track. My super devoted mother in law has also been impacted by this as she is at his beck and call 24/7 and it is clearly evident that she needs a really good break once he is back home but knowing her, she would be fussing over him like a mother hen. My mother in law is our Mother Theresa, always giving and never receiving.



Disgust

So hubby and I have been 'summoned' to organize the farewell party for a bunch of Year 6 girls from one of the prominent schools in the city. We found ourselves trapped between the parents and teachers which both parties want the best for their girls but they fail to listen what the girls really want *rolling my eyes here* event is on Monday so let's see how that would transpire.

It's crazy how dependant we are with our smart phones. Just the other day we were at a cousin's house and she has two halls. One was filled with relatives with their noses in their phones and the other filled with people watching television. Interpersonal communication has gone down to drain, I tell you. For a person with incredibly limited social interaction with fellow adults, I find this very disconcerting.

Fear

Ever since I became a mother, I fear that I have been forgetting things. My brains are slow to react in placing a memory, name, place etc. It is as though, once the baby popped, my hard drive was yanked away. As much as I remind myself to remain present, it is hardly attainable when you have a toddler who is up to mischief at all times and tries so hard to run away on her chubby legs (yeap, Pebbles can walk now! Although she reminds me of a drunk little adult) so I am always thinking of a zillion things to do at the same time and also squeeze in some time to daydream about a place where all is cool and I can finally breathe (dream on!). My Yoga teacher says that Yoga helps with the clarity of mind so I am counting on her words but that also means I need to practice Yoga at home! Arrrgh I don't have time!!
My other fear is going bald. I have so many obvious bald patches on my head and they are affecting my self esteem. I know I have to do something about it so at the moment, I am using Pebbles' shampoo (Less chemical and less expensive, haha)

Anger

Remember I attended the Translation class? Well I was asked to attend the Editing class as well and as much as I had fun catching up with the fellow translation musketeers, I found the class dead boring! All the tutors except one spend the time bragging about himself and I was actually surprised that my eyes didn't get stuck as I was rolling them far too many times. What pissed me off is the spelling and grammar mistakes found the application form. We are talking a bout a reputable Translation&Editing organization, they simply cannot commit such silly mistakes! Still makes my blood boil. Now we have been asked to collect our certificates. Why couldn't they give it when we were there for 4 days?! Seriously!

So yeah, that pretty much sums up my life of 3 weeks. Pebbles is up from her nap and I have to play with her to keep her occupied until help comes...hahaha...Ta Ta

Don't Pick a Job. Don't Pick a Boss. Pick a Leader!

A friend put this up in FB the other day and I thought how apt and timely was the advice. Another friend is going through a bad time at work because of her old and senile boss. She has been in the company for almost 10 years and they are screwing her up over petty issues. The company she works for is so archaic in people management.

It bugs me that people are still resorting to malicious ways to get rid of others whom they can't work with. Instead of resorting to diplomatic ways such as having coaching sessions and a sound consequence management, bosses are mentally torturing their staff to drive them away. So why do they do it? My personal view is they are being cowards. They are afraid to face the problem in the face and solve it because human interactions are so darn difficult.

When I was working in the corporate world, I often had to bend backwards to please people. Oh yeah, my company had fancy core values displayed every where in the building but nobody was practising it. My conscience was killing me every time a colleague complains about a boss but I could not do anything about it because the boss is apparently good in his work (never mind that his staff was leaving one by one) So that is one of the many reasons I left the corporate world. I knew things will get tougher as I climb the coveted corporate ladder and there would be a time where I would have to sell my soul and I hated that. Of course, it has been 4 months since I saw my 'salary' in my bank account but my mind and heart are definitely in sync and I have no remorse.

Do you know that most staff leave because of their bosses? I know many would say to just grit your teeth and work because you have the best job in the best company that offers great benefits. But come on guys, how about what you feel about working with the shady boss, what about your ambitions, goals and plans? I am pretty sure like the love of your life, there is a job just for you out there. All you have to do is to look for it.

Talking about bosses, my personal take is look for a leader and not a boss to work for. Someone who shares the same aspirations as you. Someone who can groom you to be better than him or her. That is the definition of a true leader. If you work with or for someone like that, I am sure you don't mind clocking in extra hours and also the not so great benefits. Don't sell your soul, people. Remember, you spent close to 10 hours at work every day so make it worthwhile and be happy doing it. And when you become a boss yourself, strive to be a leader.

I also believe it is imperative to be associated with a company that resonates with the principles you have in life. If you are like me, someone who places integrity, respect and teamwork as priorities in life, you should look for those qualities in the company you wish to work for too. For most people, work defines them so make sure it is something worth mentioning.

For my friend who works in that shitty hole (pardon my French) I hope things would get better for her and I hope she would someday find a job that would complement her skills and character. Remember, there is a perfect job for everyone out there!

The dreaded BMI

I started a torrid love affair with food 8 years ago and I am paying the consequences now. I am 30 kg more than the healthy BMI...boo hoo. Why 8 years ago? Well that's when I met my hubby. He loves food and his family consists of great cooks. Easy to shift the blame, eh? But it's true! And I may also like my snacks a wee bit too much.

All this hype of loving your body and curves and it is OK to have flabby skin because you are a mother is started to get to me because I am not fit. I can't climb a flight of stairs without panting and attempting some complicated yoga poses is a sheer torture for me (although I can execute the Camel Pose quite nicely) So yeah, I have to do something about it but what and how and most importantly will I be disciplined enough to carry out a weight loss plan?

I started a 'Eat less and Move more' campaign a while ago and that ended badly because I was snacking on nuts way too much without thinking that it could contribute to the pounds! I am beginning to think that I can also gain weight by drinking water...pffftt! And not forgetting that my idea of 'Move more' was to walk around my 1222 sq feet condo unit which is obviously not good enough... Pffftt!!! (Again)

The solution is pretty obvious. I need to exercise but truthfully, I hate to sweat! I hate it when my face is filled with sweat and my body dripping with sweat and the hair is sticky with sweat. Bet you feel like smacking my head with something hard, right?

That is why I joined Yoga! So I could do something I like and have always wanted to do and lose weight. But guess what? It is the 3rd month and Pippa has lost 4 freaking kgs and yours truly? Nil, zero, kosong, telur!!!! Every time I step on the weighing scale, I'd close my eyes only to squint a little and peek at the miserable window where my even more miserable weight would be glaring back at me. My sister in law was 'melting' away her weight as soon as she started Yoga. Life is so unfair!

Ok before you call the whambulance for this whining soul, I have good news which is I am beginning to feel the urge to exercise and eat right and I am going to pray real hard that the urge would stay. I need to be fit because Pebbles is already starting to walk and she'd be soon running around and I need to be fit to run after her. That should be a substantial motivation, right? Plus I want to wear my jeans! It has almost been two years since I wore one.

Oh well, enough of me ranting about the never ending weight issue..but trust me, I am not like some women who go on lamenting about their weight gain when in actual fact they are as thin as a matchstick. Whenever 'such ladies' start complaining about their so called horrendous weight gain, I would cheekily ask them 'You put on weight on your nose?' I know I am mean but come on la! You don't whine about your 'invisible' weight gain in front of an obese friend! I know I am being harsh but I am talking about myself so that's OK.

So here's to making reasonable goals and achieving them.Will keep you posted on my success story (I am being incredibly positive, here) at the end of the year (Oh, don't worry, I'd still write but would not mention the 'W' word again till December)

Ta ta

Image from Queen of Sass, FB

The Translation Musketeers

We humans are social creatures. As much as I think I am an introvert, I truly enjoy the occasional chances of meeting new and like minded people.

The translation class I was attending for two weeks ended with an exam last Saturday and I find myself missing my classmates very much. True, I dreaded every time I had to drive for almost an hour to get to class and it took me longer time to get back home simply because I don't like driving but I did find myself enjoying the classes very much. Maybe because it had to do with languages which I am falling in love with once again but I also fervently believe that it was the colourful characters the 17 of us displayed during the entire 10 days we spent together. There was never a dull moment with these ladies. It's amazing to know how we can 'click' so easily and how we can actually converse about any topics under the sun! It further reiterates that we SAHM are not boring, people (pls throw away that primitive perception of yours)

There were 3 women in the course whom I was drawn to especially for their special qualities. First is Kak Sha who sat next to me in class. At a glance, she would remind you of Queen Elinor of the Brave cartoon; poised and elegant and she speaks gently with everyone.I liked the fact that she matches her watch's straps with her outfits. It somehow made her appear to be someone who you shouldn't mess with. She always paid unwavering attention in class and also let me use her dictionaries (such a kind soul) Kak Sha is a firm believer that learning is a continuous process and has already attended a myriad of training programs since she left work a year ago. A mother of two grown ladies, she doesn't look a day older than 40 and she is already planning to pursue her studies in Social Science! (She has a degree in Physics, u guys! She said Physics made sense as compared to Chemistry and Biology. I was like 'What?!' ) And she is so tech savvy all because she wants to be able to understand the Information Age, her daughters are navigating in.I have resolved to be just like her when I grow up :P

Next is Rachel who doesn't wear a watch. I must say this because who doesn't wear a watch these days?!!! Well except Rachel and my husband, of course! A person bursting with so much energy, Rachel speaks with her hands which is they go all over the place. She becomes very animated when she is telling a story be it about her super adorable daughters or even the food served that day. She is such a delight to be with. A person who loves to talk, Rachel is also a remarkable listener. She listens to you and comments accordingly ( she has to comment, I meant that in a good way)

Finally, Zaitul. Like me she is at class very early ( before 8am, class starts at 9am) to get a good parking spot but unlike me she is a good driver. Zaitul is the quiet one but is extremely funny when she chooses to be. We have breakfast every day together and we are always talking about our kids and laughing over the silliest things. She sits in front of me and Kak Sha in class so we often discuss our exercises together. Being a victim of mental bloke, I always ask Zaitul the translation for the simplest words. She replies me with the answers but not without giving me the look which literally says 'seriously, you didn't know that?!' and that always cracks me up. She likes to read the texts aloud and feels that it is her absolute responsibility to add life to the characters in the text which is very hilarious. She knows how much I hate driving and on the day of our exam, it was raining cats and dogs and obviously yours truly was shit scared but Zaitul in her usual funny way told me to stay calm, drive slow, use the indicators and cheekily added that I should use the wipers and not my hands to wipe the windscreen! I know, she is mean but we like her :)

All three women are equally good in the translation course hence me calling them the Translation Musketeers (Remember Arthos, Porthos and Aramis? I am D'Artagnan :P )

So in the two weeks, I have not only learn a new skill which is translation and also drive alone for more than an hour (it is an achievement, guys. I HAVE to mention it), I also found some really good friends.These 3 gorgeous ladies along with the others made learning translation class all the more fun and interesting. Thank you, dears. Now the real challenge begins; keeping in touch!

Me,Rachel and Zaitul before the exam.

Zaitul thought it would tarnish her image if she did monkey faces

The Love for Language

I love languages. As much as I would have liked to master more languages, age is proving to be a huge obstacle (Oh yeah, I am simply giving excuses). I have been undergoing translation class for the past week and and I am now onto the second week and trust me guys, it is not easy!

The first two days, we were inundated with nouns and grammar and our heads (my classmates and mine) were spinning like tops (Gasing). It is very interesting yet frustrating because the norm is we go with whatever that sounds right in our head (or heart) which most of the time is not right. Note: It's Martabak, guys not Murtabak..tee hee

Over the weekend, I had the opportunity to assess some students who have applied for scholarship from a reputable company. This company hired another independent company to conduct the assessment and in turn this company hired a group of people with diverse backgrounds to be assessors all in the name of being neutral, me being one of them :)

Honestly, I was a little disappointed with the command of language these kids had. They could neither speak fluently in English nor Bahasa Melayu and it was saddening. I don't know, maybe I had very high expectations but the general comments from the other assessors were of similar nature besides commenting that the kids were not putting in much effort. They are the future of our country!

Coming back to the topic of language, I rarely meet someone who can speak both English and BM fluently and I find that very odd especially people of other countries can converse comfortably in their mother tongue besides English. So who is to be blamed? The education system? Our parents? Or ourselves? Or is it something inherent? Don't you find it disturbing that a Bangladeshi can speak BM more fluently that our kids? I do! I think they are highly adaptable in mastering languages.

I am as guilty in not being fluent in these two languages. I speak and write proficiently (I think la) in English. Sadly after school, I don't speak and write fluently in BM anymore. I love BM. It's a beautiful language and I have already made a mental note in ensuring Pebbles be fluent in English, BM, Tamil and Mandarin.

The past few days have taught me the importance of writing and speaking right in both languages and it is so much fun learning to do just that. One of our instructors even mentioned that one good thing in doing translation work is you get to be smarter as you tend to be on the look out for new words and also constantly correcting/translating sentences mentally which is so cool (Who wouldn't like that?)

Personally, I get so worked up when I come across Malay phrases that have been modified with English words in it to appear more hype like kipidap = Keep it up, doter= daughter, sukses=success and many more. Come on guys, cintailah bahasa kita!

Although the year is almost ending, I have made a resolution to learn how to speak and write both languages excellently. How about you?

Image from Google

Driving

I absolutely hate driving.It all started when it took me forever to pass the exams (I failed at parking twice) then when I started to drive in Ipoh while studying Form 6, I had a minor accident,  a few years later, my sister, Hazel was involved in an accident that was pretty bad but she was OK albeit two front teeth :P and then I met my husband who drove me everywhere.

You see, while my sister still drove after the accident and can even ride a motorcycle now, I still cringe at the idea of being on the road along with other drivers and the scary motorcyclists simply because I am a bad driver. I don't have blind spots, I have a blind range. When I drive, no one can speak to me and there is no way I would text or pick up a call because my eyes will be darting from the side and rear mirrors. Most of the time, I would not have the radio on too. On average, I drive about 3 times a year when it is ABSOLUTELY necessary (of course after much whining and pouting) I am totally cool with taking a taxi or public transportation to anywhere I want to go (I am sure you want to knock my head now)

But yeah, that is how I am. I don't have a phobia towards driving it's just that I don't enjoy driving. Many women equate driving to freedom (which I can't fathom) so they think I am being primitive by not driving. Well everyone has a right to an opinion right?

So life was going all fine when one fine day God decided to make me drive.You see, I have signed up for a translation class which is held in Wangsa Maju and we live at Old Klang Road (so freaking far, OK) Worst part is the class is for 2 long weeks and hubby said I needed to drive :( as he obviously had work to do and couldn't possible drive his loving wife back and forth. He was sweet enough to send and fetch me for 2 days and on the third day, I was supposed to drive Pippa's car but her car battery died. I thought God didn't want me to drive so hubby had to send the gleeful me.

He made sure the car was in tip top condition; filled up the tank, topped up the Smart Tag card and parked it nicely for me so I can drive without having to maneuver from the parking space. Darn! So I drove today and it was a stressful journey. Got lost and made frantic phone calls to hubby.Really thought he would say 'Come home darling, I'll send you' but NO! He calmly gave me instructions so I said a prayer and trudged along. I reached safely and had to take 2 Panadols to cure my headache due to stress. You see what driving does to me!!! And now it is raining!!! Going to pray extra hard that it'll stop soon.

Before you think I am a spoiled brat, let me tell you that I really don't enjoy driving! It is no fun for me. I was born to day dream in the car, to read billboards and mentally calculate all the number plates so I can enhance my arithmetic skills. So if you see an overly stressed out, specky, mumbling-to-herself lady driver (no I am not going to give you my car number and model), it is probably me so just wave and drive on.

Oh dear, one day down (OK, half day) and 6 more days to go! I guess I have increased the number of times I have driven this year... Yay! (Unenthusiastically)

Picture taken after I have parked..Duh!

Confessions of a horrible mother

I hit the lowest point (my version) in my journey called motherhood early this morning. I whacked Pebbles on her calf 4 times! Gasp!Horror!Cringe! Yeap, I did that.Not my proudest moment and I am ashamed at myself for doing what I did. My friend once posted in FB for feeling bad because she raised her voice at her toddler and here I am whacking my poor helpless child. I know my sisters are going to flip big time when they read this so I better quickly explain myself.

Pebbles caught the dreaded flu bug over the weekend  and understandably she was grumpy and not her usual self.  Last night she took it one notch higher by throwing a tantrum in the likes of throwing her head back and crying, hitting her head on the floor and screaming her lungs out.

When Pebbles returned from the baby sitter's, she was already cranky. Refused to take her biscuits for tea time and cried out loud when we wiped her snot. Out of sheer exhaustion, she slept off on Hubby's shoulder and as I was about to soak in the brief reprieve, she woke up wailing loudly. I thought she was hungry so gave her dinner of which she spat out angrily. I checked with my husband who confirmed that she finished her lunch at the baby sitter's. Thinking that she had no appetite, I let her play but our little Miss Sunshine was in the mood of throwing her toys on the floor and strewing all her flash cards at the dining area, my patience was already wearing thin. We were expecting guests for dinner and I had earlier tidied up the house

When the guests came over, they were cooing over her and Pebbles loved the attention. She was relaxed and played with them only to turn all cranky again as they stepped out to leave (Talk about Mr.Jekyll and Mr.Hyde, man) If the little one was grumpy, the mother was SUPER DUPER Grumpy (I know, poor hubby).

She only slept at 12.30am. Woke up at 1.45am, crying loudly as though ants were biting her body (I did check for ants, Negative) Gave her milk to drink so she slept off. Woke up crying again at 2.45am, 3,30am, 4,00am, 4,30am, 5.00am. Every time I patted her to sleep on my chest, she slept off only to wake up wailing (with eyes closed) when I gently (very very gently) placed her in her crib. I was at my wits end. I just didn't know what she wanted. I gave her milk again but she refused. I walked around with her in my arms singing lullaby (in a raspy voice) she still cried. I didn't know what to do. I was tired and confused and angry as hell not to mention close to tears. I was going to wake up at 6 am to meditate, have some coffee, prepare her meal and leave for my 8 o'clock Yoga class and I had hardly slept.

At 5.00 am, I rocked her on my lap ( a little too roughly) but she slept off and I thought it was best to place her between me and hubby. She sighed loudly turned over and started crying again, that was the last straw, I gave her 4 quick whacks on her calf which obviously made her wail even more but that got my husband jump from the bed, scooped Pebbles and promptly told me that he was going to sleep in the guest room with her. I was breathing heavily like a mad bull but I strained to hear if she was still crying. No sound so I went to the room and she was curled up like a bunny and snoring away! My husband turned to me and told me to get some rest. I came back to our room.Instead of catching some sleep, I burst into tears berating myself for being a horrible mother. I cried and cried and slept off only to wake up less than 30 minutes later because I thought she was crying. Went back to the other room and she was still in the same position. I knew sleep had eluded me so I decided to meditate and of course my baby's tear streaked face was on my mind throughout my meditation session. I contemplated whether I should attend the Yoga class but I knew I needed to let go some of my pent up emotions so I went (Of which I am glad I did). Came home to find that she was still asleep breathing through her mouth because her itty bitty nostrils were blocked with mucus (sorry for being graphic). I quickly prepared her breakfast, woke my husband up as he had to some errands to run. I was embarrassed to look him in his eyes but I gathered my courage to seek his forgiveness for raising my hand at our child to which he simply said, 'It's OK darling. You were tired' My sweet and forgiving man.

At the sound of the front door shutting, Pebbles woke up and when she saw me she gave her sweet smile and my heart melted. How could I whack this little cherubic child of mine? All is good with mother and daughter now. We played some games. Gave her a bath, fed her and sang her lullaby for her after bath nap.

Personally, it was an eventful morning for me and I really hope I would be more mindful the next time Pebbles doesn't act the way I want her to. After all, I am the mother and she is only a helpless child. I still feel awful for what I did but it serves as a reminder that I should always control my emotions. Motherhood is definitely not for the faint hearted, I tell you!

my poor unwell baby

Leaving the Nest

Earlier today, we sent off my husband's cousin at KLIA. She was flying off to the UK to pursue her studies. Since her mother was following her, there were no tears (Such a brave girl. I think I would be bawling my eyes out even if my whole family was following me) however the father and brother did tear a little (My hug tugs when I see men cry). It was a typical day at the airport. People coming and going, there was a bunch of youngsters taking group pictures and I reckoned some of them were leaving for studies too and the others were sending them off.

At a corner, I saw a youngster 'Salam' his mother and she grabbed him in a tight hug. Tears were streaming down her cheeks and that very scene hit me solid. Here was a mother sending off her child, her baby regardless his age and her heart was breaking. I hugged Pebbles tightly who at that point was squirming because she wanted to crawl on the airport's shiny floor (in her milk stained PJs,don't judge me!)

The journey back home was a quiet one. Pebbles fell asleep in her car seat. Husband was busy navigating the slippery road and I had my over active mind to myself. I wondered how would I feel if Pebbles was leaving home for studies or even for work? The moment I conceived Pebbles, I was already planning her life which included studying at the prestigious London School of Economics but now I am having second thoughts. Will I be able to bear the thought of separating from her?

I remembered my dad had tears in his eyes when he dropped me at my dorm and the facilitator announced to all the parents that they had to leave. I was puzzled after all I was at UM, only 8 hours away (by bus) from KT ('Get a grip,dad' said my little heart) Donkey years later, it finally dawned upon me that my father was sad to let his little girl go. He was worried for her safety and knew no one can take care of her like he had done (which is true because Pops is the best).

Now that I am a parent,I totally understand the anxiety, worries and concerns that accompany parents when their kids leave the nests be it for studies or for work. And since I was also a youngster (OK, donkey years ago) my concerns were all about getting new friends who can click with me, wearing the nicest clothes to class, getting good grades and finding a boyfriend..lol

I am pretty convinced that youngsters these days are way much different now compared to the majority during my time. With the concept of YOLO (You only live once) inculcated within them, many are striving to excel in their personal lives. They are well informed about the majors they can best excel in and are already charting out their future which includes working overseas (can't blame them, ahem ahem) But the fundamentals are the same. When they are about to leave their nests to spread their wings and broaden their horizons, their family (especially their parents and siblings) take a back seat when they decide to spend extra time with people who matter before they leave.

You find them worrying about the friends they are leaving behind, the comfort zone where all their meals are taken care of and clothes are washed as well as an ever ready ATM machines. Most would be busy thinking about themselves instead of the loved ones they are leaving behind. Well, your father might miss the morning debates about the country's economic status, your mother might miss nagging you, your siblings might miss borrowing your things without asking your permission and in return getting an earful from you. Family can be troublesome and not fun at all like your cool friends but always remember, Family comes first (My dad's favourite mantra) They are your pillar of strength. If anything goes wrong, you can count on your family to fall back on.

So my dear young friends, when you are about to leave the nest to embark on your new adventure, do spend as much time as possible with your family members. Don't be shy to tell them that you love them (So what, if they laugh at you? Laugh along!) If your mother and father cry, let them...don't mock them..you will always be their baby.. if your siblings suddenly become distant, get closer to them..they just don't want to miss you so much when you are not around...Spend some time talking about the good old days..build new memories..make them laugh and remember their faces because those are the images that will keep you company during the lonely days in the foreign land.

With the advance of technology, they would be 'closer' to you (I cringe to think of those days' communication lines) Do call or WatsApp them often with heartfelt messages (not only to get them to send more money la) I am not saying to be homesick and all but hey do have fun but be safe OK..no point being a daredevil if it is going to hurt your family 'coz it ain't worth it, buddy'

On another note, dear parents, do let go of your babies with a loving heart, blessings and prayers. With your solid upbringing, I am pretty sure they would be just fine (No harm in reminding them not to come back with a Mat Salleh girlfriend or boyfriend, though...just kidding!)

For those of who 'yang tak jadi' go overseas, don't fret..the local universities are OK (Well, I turned out just fine!) Your job is to visit your friends' families so they would not miss their kids so much (plus you get to eat home cooked food too). You are also required to sock your friends' faces if ever they come back with a weird 'Orang Putih' accent.Nothing beats Manglish, right?

So I am signing off with a message of 'All the very best' to you, young munchkins and I would also like to quote Amy Chua, the famous Tiger Mother: 'Be modest, be humble, be simple. Make sure you come in first,so you have something to be humble about'
Carpe Diem!

In the meantime, I am going to check UM's portal to see if they have an awesome Economic major for Pebbles to take up so she can be in my radar (at all times)..hah!

Image from Google

Wedding Fever

I absolutely love weddings. I love watching the gorgeous brides and equally good looking grooms. I like checking out the decorations and tucking in the yummy food. Weddings are awesome. I even tear when the Thali is tied or when the rings are slipped into the fingers. Can't help it, I am a hopeless romantic.

One of the tasks I help my husband (rather eagerly) is in the wedding planning part. He is a wedding planner although an organizer would be a better name for what he actually does. If you want a point of reference on the best and affordable venue, caterer,decorator or even performers for your big day, you may reach him by contacting me. OK enough of marketing his skills :)

The both of us place much emphasis on the smooth flow of the big day like from the moment the bride and groom leave their respective residences heading to the wedding venue right up to when they leave after the wedding. We ensure there are no hiccups and the newlyweds are stress free. Not surprisingly, prior to the wedding we meet up with the bride and groom and their families to plan and discuss. More often than not, there will be some stress and tension which is totally normal.

To date, I have helped my husband close to 50 weddings and I have seen many kinds of brides and grooms. From the overzealous kind to the extremely laid back kind, I have seen it all but beneath all that what I have observed is how much effort and time were put into the one day event which undoubtedly is marked as the most important day of their lives.

Planning a wedding can be stressful but what I would like to highlight to all the soon to be newlyweds is that YOU can make it less stressful and more enjoyable and this is what I would suggest you to do:

1. Create a vision board with your partner on your perfect wedding
2. Always include your families in your discussion regardless if they are paying for it or not (Families are important)
3. Be open to feedback. If you don't like their ideas, don't tell them right away. Sleep on it and chances are, you would accept their ideas wholly or better still they would accept yours :)
4. Enlist the help of trusted friends and family members. Delegation of tasks is the key of success in making your big day perfect.
5. Arguments with your partner and family members are inevitable. Always strive to be the better person in the situation. Hold back and take a deep breath before you retaliate. This is to avoid saying things you would regret later.
6. Pray, meditate or do the things you like i.e exercising, window shopping, spa to keep your sanity in check.
7. Eat healthily and drink PLENTY of water
8. Every night before you sleep, write a list of things of 'Why you love your partner' Remember to be positive (It's all about the law of attraction)
9. Get someone reliable to handle any crisis at home i.e not enough mango leaves or coconuts (seriously,why would anyone bother to update you about it. But they would because they are stressed out and need someone to vent out to. Don't be the victim)
10. Research on wedding photos you would want to take and discuss with your photographer. Inform your planner so sufficient amount of time is kept aside to take these momentous photos.

I thought, I would just limit the list to 10 because knowing you if you are like me, you would have scoured the Internet on the Do's and Don'ts of planning a wedding. All I want to say is (again) Relax. A wise person said to me, a wedding is a day affair but a marriage is a lifetime affair, one should invest more time and effort in it rather than the wedding itself. True, huh?

In my opinion, what you should look forward to on the wedding day is the smile on your partner' face the moment he/she sees you for the first time in the wedding finery. The feel of your spouse's hand right after you are pronounced as man and wife. The look you give each other and silently promising that you have each others back come what may...oh those are the things you need to look forward to. At all the weddings that I have helped my husband in, I always pause to watch when the Thali is tied because my heart will tug when the bride and groom look at each other and give each other a sweet smile and I will go like 'Awww' (Told you I am a hopeless romantic)

And guys, do drop a compliment or two when your bride sits/stands next to you, I would guarantee she would flash you a beaming smile (Do you know that the price for wedding make up is exorbitant?!)And ladies, no harm in complimenting your man either. Do reassure each other constantly if the other appears to be agitated or even (God Forbid!) panicky. And please, pay attention to the master of the ceremony,the priest and be immersed in the prayers or sermons he is saying (simply because it is sacred and super important) and don't be a busybody looking out if your boss had come for your wedding, Geez!

Apart from that, be nice and appreciative of your families (immediate and extended) as they are instrumental in making this day a success and their blessings are important.

And when you finally get the wedding album, do spend some quiet time with your spouse, reminisce the wonderful day or laugh together at the (laughable) hiccups.

To those who think weddings are a hassle, think again. It can be hassle free if you tackle the preparations with an open mind and a big loving heart. And if things don't go your way on that day, take a deep breath and just remember you are marrying the person you have chosen and love with all your heart so that is what matters (not the unmatched colours of the drapes!).Lastly, always remember, all the silliest things you are fretting over now in the name of having the wedding of your dreams, they would deem unimportant a year later and you may regret making it a big deal.

So guys, Keep calm and get married! I am so excited with the line up of weddings I have this year although they are going to create a huge dent on this SAHM's pocket..lol

One of my favourite photos of our wedding. My sister in law said that it was a look signalling the beginning of the reign of a Queen Control. She is a genius

Perception

It has been three months since I became a Stay at Home Mother and I have been asked (in my opinion) the silliest questions which are:

1. So, how is it like being a lady of leisure?

Seriously, leisure? The curious me actually looked up on the Webster dictionary to find out what it actually means and it says A lady who is of independent means and so does not need employment; one who is free from duties and responsibilities. A stay at home mother is free from duties and responsibilities?! Have you been smoking pot? So no, you absolutely can't equate the term lady of leisure with a SAHM simply because we WORK at home. Our duties and responsibilities are towards our family just like a FTWM (in case you don't know, it is Full Time Working Mom) and to add on, we earn peanuts for doing just that.

2. So, how do you fill your day?

Hmmm...let me see, I wake up and do my hair and nails and meet up with my chic ladies for breakfast and then go for a massage, meet my hubby for lunch and if possible try to spend some time with my almost 10 month old baby girl who crawls everywhere and who happens to love eating newspapers and batteries. Oh my god! What is wrong with these people? The irritating part is they have this silly smirk on their faces as though they actually think I am doing all that I have mentioned on daily basis.

3. So, you must be very happy being so free now?

Excuse me Uncle, please define Free? Just because I am at home watching over my child like a hawk (Did I mention she loves to eat the newspaper?) instead of attending some high powered meetings, I am free? I am happy but I am not free and definitely not SO FREE.

Ok now that I have got that off my chest, I am feeling much better. Honestly, these questions irked the hell out of me until recently (OK I admit, only 2 days ago) when I realise it is all about perception. It is all about how a person perceives us as SAHM. I know there are many of you out there who have been subjected to worst questions like 'You study so hard and you became a housewife?' Seriously dude, get a grip. If you are not paying us allowances, just zip it ok.

Yeah, we are not juggling work and family like the FTWM (I salute you ladies, by the way) but hey don't look down at those who chose to be SAHM la. There are many reasons why a mother chooses to be a SAHM and as for me, I took the decision to be with Pebbles for at least 6 months and find out if I have what it takes to be an effective SAHM (still finding out, guys) as opposed to bending backwards to please my boss and get subjected to ridiculous KPIs at work (Not worth it at all)

My former boss told me, being a SAHM is not for the faint hearted. It is an extremely BORING job which I totally agree. There are days I can hardly string a proper sentence in English because I spend the day babbling with Pebbles who at this stage enjoys clucking her tongue and I die for adult interactions with like minded people (My husband is Sports oriented)

Hey,I am not complaining. I enjoy every single minute I get to spend with Pebbles but who doesn't crave for a moment of uninterrupted meal and long naps or even a chat with a good friend via WatsApp? Every day is a new adventure with my darling Pebbles. Putting her on a routine proved futile and I always feel like I am walking on egg shells when she is asleep so I could get some chores done.

So guys, you see, we SAHMs have our own struggles too and instead of judging us for having it easy (I always feel like punching the person in the face when one utters the word, EASY or FREE, they are absolutely the Taboo words in my life at the moment) do support us in the name of Sisterhood of Parenthood. It is absolutely imperative to get the support from fellow mothers. Guys and uncles don't really understand so we ladies need to stick together, huh?

My sister, Tara and I are SAHMs but unlike her, I get to send Pebbles to the babysitter so I could get some work done with my husband. She on the other hand,has her cute like a button but extremely inquistive 18 month old toddler with her the whole day until her husband returns home from work. But my sister never once told me that I have an easy life because she understands I have different struggles like how I have to be with Pebbles at night alone when husband is away managing an event.

And guys, just because we are at home the whole day with our kids, it doesn't mean we are not capable of having a conversation with you at parties. I was once asked by a stranger at a party about my occupation and when I told her that I am a SAHM, she just said a tiny 'oh' and walked away! Like hello! I am more than capable of having a conversation about current issues, lady. Quantum physics? Bring it on. I was a little snubbed but I knew it was her poor perception on SAHM that made her act like that.

Talking about perceptions, I found an interesting analogy that defines perception in the simplest way. You see, an owl and a human perceive daylight differently. We are awake during the day but the owl is asleep and vice versa at night. For the owl, the daylight is nightime for it. Interesting huh? So yeah, I firmly belive that is how the others view SAHMs. That we are free, happy, have no worries, lucky etc but no all are true and also untrue.

Despite living on one paycheck, I have done quite a number of things as a SAHM, I have taken up Yoga, started meditating, started this blog and I am truly happy  because I made a concious decision to be with my child and my husband supported the decision. If I had continued working, I don't think I would be truly this contented.That is all that matters to me.

So I can tell fellow SAHMs to just brush aside the hurtful comments or stinging questions that assail us by thinking it is all about perceptions because after all the grass is greener on the other side but I would also like to remind the none SAHMs; FTWMs and others please be more tactful in your interrogation sessions with us, SAHMs.

And remember, we all are in this adventure called Parenthood together albeit the backgrounds and beliefs we have.

Pebbles, just seconds before she reached for her Papa's watch and broke it by slamming it to the floor