June 5

I am a person who remembers milestones so June 5 is an interesting date for me because:

1. June 5, 2015

I quit my corporate job. A wide eyed young mother who was determined to take care of her baby and assist her husband in his entrepreneurial endeavour.

2. June 5, 2016
I was the team manager for a cricket team who emerged as the runners up on the corporate league

3. June 5, 2017
Found out I was pregnant for the second time. To be honest, I wasn't thrilled because I had so many plans in store for work with hubby. It wasn't a smooth pregnancy. I was often sick and in extremely bad mood. It's a miracle my son is a happy baby who readily gives heart melting gummy smiles

4. June 5, 2018
I am at home with two kids, house is filthy and I haven't done any proper work since January 16. In short, I am MISERABLE

It has dawned upon me (rather belatedly and while deflating my ego enormously) I am not cut out to be a SAHM or a WAHM. I don't have the dedication, commitment and consistency to do either. Admitting to defeat sucks big time but it is time to face the reality.

I crave for my own desk and PC. For colleagues and deadlines. For boring meetings and fussy bosses. I miss them all. The 3 year career break I had taken has made me realise that I thrive in an office environment with a steady pay check. I am not an effective leader but an extremely good follower.

I am turning the grand old 37 in 4 days time and I have decided to hunt for a job. A job that is fulfilling. It may not be the best but I aspire to be a good employee. My kids? They will be fine. They are hardy unlike me so wish me luck!